Kanye West : My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy
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Kanye West : My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

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My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy? More like…

My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy ? More like: my beautiful, dark, twisted, deep, shamelessly ugly, confronting, enlightened, refreshing, introspective, fuckin’ ridiculous, GOOD Friday-preceded, leak-prone, Twitter-aged, Myspace-streamed, blogosphere-storming, market-savvy, self-effacing, self-aggrandising, 35 minute phoenix-fucking film clip-accompanied, interpersonal, intrapersonal, auto-flagellated, Kings Of Leon-checking, douchebag/arsehole/scumbag-toasting, uplifting, grandiose, Napoleonic complex-bearing, Napoleon Dynamite-quoting, flaw-exaggerating, meme-defying, paradigm-shifting, humourless, outright hilarious, witty, retrospective, gentrifying, crate-scavenging, proggy, 21st century, schizoid, King Crimson-sampling, POWERfully mean, meaningful, punch-drunk, drug-addled, drug-renouncing, pussy and religion-embracing, (Black Sabbath’s) Iron Man-biting, mainstream-encompassing, unifying, pornographic, porn star-matrimony aspiring, bombastic, iconoclastic, MJ-mourning, mother-yearning, zeitgeist-capturing, era-defining, genre-defying, hip-hop-historical, mould-breaking, logically extreme, overblown, subdued, reflective, precise, ego-stroking, monstrous, peerless, all-star, obscure Bon Iver EP-borrowing, RZA-assisted, pussy-upholstering, Chris Rock-reviving, Nicki Minaj-star-making, MC Hammer petty beef-instigating, sneering, snarling, empire-building, perfectionist, hater-embracing, glitched-out, overly compressed, autotune-breaking, pixelated, elegant, fuckin’ ridiculous, overindulgent, narrative-crafting, self-assured, orchestral, groundbreaking, full-blown psychotic, psyche-excavating, id-ridden, cathartic, exhilarating, conflicted, scandal-ignorant, heavenly, hell-fraught, demon-exorcising, Allah-praising, meticulous, carefree, sample-heavy, simile-devoid, cliché-resistant, gimmick-free, stylish, substantial, excessive, uninhibited, mature, bratty, well-rounded, business-like, brutally honest, cocksure, dick-flashing, consistently compelling, wonderfully consistent, so appalling, so damn appealing, classy, gaudy, mythologising, dope-as-hell beat dropping, beatifying, stirring, anthemic, masculine, emasculated, chauvinistic, post-feminist, luminescent, justifiably arrogant, appropriately humble, exquisite, exhibitionist, patriotic, stratospheric, grounded, level-headed, artistic, fuckin’ ridiculous, gilded, brash, game-changing, landmark, incomparable, heroic, freakish, historic, slammin’, bangin’, hecka-jammin’, critically-acclaimed, 10 from Rolling Stone-scoring (who gives a shit?), 10.0 from Pitchfork-scoring (HOLY FUCKING SHIT!), giddying, frightfully great, finely crafted, hyperbole-inducing, goddamn masterpiece of a fantastical fantasy.

I mean, this shit is fuckin’ ridiculous. Fuckin’ ridiculous.

Kanye West’s new album My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy is out now on

Universal/Def Jam/Roc-A-Fella Records