Holy Stain! Pissed Jeans are the guests of honour at the soiree this evening, and they’re bringing Honeys. The waiting room will be dead silent until every other guest has arrived and when this happens, the unveiling of debauchery is delivered by the sounds of Bathroom Laughter. Not the frigid giggle type you might remember from your shitty high school wank party. This is Pissed Jeans’ kinda bathroom laughter where blood pours from the holes on either side of your head, while you ineptly slant over the hand basin pulling hair and yelling vomit, all before midnight.
The noise of drone throughout Honeys is significantly less in comparison to an old Pissed Jeans record of 2007, Hope For Men, although, they haven’t left guests entirely drone free this evening. Partygoers will be in a trance as soon as Chain Worker commences – the type of dreamy state that one can only relate to The Walking Dead episode where the deceased family slur out of the barn, one by one, screaming a slow swag.
Oh, Pissed Jeans can do melodic too. Every party requires some romp and the sounds of Romanticize Me and You’re Different (In Person) will deliver. And it’s at this stage of the night when a bathroom Belgium Louboutin isn’t a bad idea. It’s time to crank Loubs, get buck and make it quick. Quick because Health Plan follows and this will throw you with lyrics like “I stay away from doctors.” If Pissed Jeans have any influence on their audience, sharing bathroom antics with this kind of crowd can only lead to hell problems.
BY MATT MARASCO
Best Track: Health Plan
If You Like These, You’ll Like This: NIRVANA, BLACK FLAG, FUCKED UP
In A Word: Bass-distortion-rules
